Thursday, April 10, 2008

Motherhood ~ The good....and the bad....

I love being a mother. Most of the time it is wonderful. Sometimes...not so much.

I am guilty of thinking I have so much to do that I don't have time to lay down with the kids at night before they go to sleep. Most nights they don't ask, it's put them in bed and your done. But occasionally they do want me to lay with them for a minute. More often than not I get out of it because of all those other more important things that need to get done. I was reminded a couple of nights ago of just what I was "getting out of". I was putting my two year old to bed and he looked at me and patted his pillow for me to lie down with him. Well, I couldn't resist. So I laid down with him. A moment later he turns to me and snuggles in as close as he could possibly get to me. Then, another moment later he rolls over a little and rubs the side of my face with his little hand. I closed my eyes just savoring the moments. Then I feel this tiny little finger brushing back and forth over my eyelashes. What a sweet heart he is. In that one instance I was reminded just how wonderful it is being a mother. Words can not describe a mother's love.

In the wee hours of the morning this morning, my 9 year old comes in and says "mommy, can I lay with you?". So I told her to climb on in. She gets in and tries to go back to sleep. She holds my arm and plants tiny little kisses on it I could barely feel. Then a few minutes later I hear this barely audible voice saying "I love you mommy". Need I say more????

Those are such precious moments in life. Along with those there are the moments that are heart breaking for a mom. Olivia, the 9 year old, was crying last night when I went in to tuck her in. Apparently a girl at school has been telling her how fat she is. I spent time consoling her and trying to assure her she is not fat. So, this morning as I was dropping her off at school I noticed how self conscious she was acting about how her clothes fit and looked. My heart is broken for her. She should not have to feel this way at 9 years old. This is when it stinks to be a mother. I can't do a thing to take those feelings away from my poor little baby.

This is not a good picture but it should show you how "fat" she is (NOT!). :(

5 comments:

Sonya said...

I assume the gal that told Olivia this is nine too. That being the case, can someone please tell me what in the world a nine year old knows about being fat? My youngest is 9 and I can't imagine her having to worry about someone telling her she was fat. It's nuts. I'm thankful she is at home with me every minute so that she doesn't have to deal with these types of silly things. The sad thing for Olivia is that it will probably continue until she has graduated. Someone will be forever picking on or teasing other kids. Makes me so mad!

annie said...

Those are such sweet times with the kiddos Judi. You're a great mom!
That age is brutal. I remember with Amanda and now Emelia is there going through it all.

Coach J said...

Enjoy those moments. They go away way too fast!
You know, girls ages 8 to about 17 really make me shake my head in disbelief. I've noticed my daughter going through the same thing. She's real uncomfortable with herself around other girls. Comparison sucks. (So why do I keep doing that at 34??)

gail@more than a song said...

Such sweet times you talked about while laying down with your kids, enjoy them all and do it as often as you can! You won't be sorry when they're older; I sometimes wish I could do it again (then I might come to my senses!) Oh I kid but do savor it all.
And the more time you might spend with them just might help her in the long run with all the things she'll have with other kids.

Shawna said...

What precious memories to share! I put Scamp down for a nap today and was rushing out of her room, but then she said "I love you, Mama!" I had forgotten to tell her I loved her like I usually do.

I'm so sorry for Olivia. She is so beautiful!